That’s hulk calling his boss to snitch that his fellow wrestlers are trying to unionize
Or just to tell him how bloated he is after fucking his friends wife.
He shouldn’t have eaten that sushi.
Ah Hulk. Before we knew.
In hindsight maybe we should have been concerned about the mania
Wait, fill me in. What happened?
The picture is on my phone.
It is the picture of a bunch of sweaty dudes. They are in a dorm room, in 2002.
In twelve seconds time, I drop the phone to the floor at my feet, a clumsy old fool.
It’s already lying there, twelve seconds into the future.
Ten seconds now.
The phone is in my hand.
I found the picture in my photo archive, twenty-seven minutes ago.
It’s still there, twenty-seven minutes into the past, in a folder, unopened for the last two decades.
I’m still there, looking at it.
The picture is on my phone. Twelve boys have set up two televisions and Xboxes in a 10x12 room. Halo: Combat Evolved is paused.
Seven seconds now.
It’s December, 2024. I’m on the toilet.
It’s July, 2002. I’m in New Jersey, in my dorm room.
Four seconds, three.
I’m tired of sitting on the toilet now.
I stand up.
The phone falls to the floor at my feet.
I am going to take pictures of the stars. They are so far away. And their light takes so long to reach us… All we ever see of stars are their old photohraphs.
The picture is on my phone. Twelve boys have set up two televisions and Xboxes in a 10x12 room. Halo: Combat Evolved is paused.
Whenever I see old LAN Party photos like that, all I can think about is how awful those rooms must have smelt like, and the electricity bill.
Electricity was relatively cheap back then, and nose blindness is a thing. 😅
The light from the closest star (excluding the Sun) takes about four years to get here. Might be a bit stale but it’s not, like, the light of the ancients. It’s more like the light of the Jan. 6th insurrection.
You’re not wrong.
And full disclosure, I was paraphrasing Dr. Manhattan’s monologue from chapter 4 of Watchmen. A kind of tongue-in-cheek homage, if you will
Dr Manhattan needs to take it down a notch. Although I guess he probably can see far off galaxies with the naked eye which would be very ancient light. On the other hand Dr Manhattan exists outside of time, as evidenced by his ability to… Wait, am I remembering this correctly? Was he banging his ex-girlfriend’s daughter while getting something out of the fridge in another room at the same time?
Spoilers for a 37 year old comic book
Not just banging his ex-girlfriend’s daughter (who was a product of SA btw). Giving her a threesome with two simulacrums while he conducted experiments in a lab down the hall. And then gets confused when she gets mad that he’s not giving her 100% of his attention during sex. And then gets a big ol sad when she leaves him for a doughy Batman. And then a bigger sad when he learns he gave all of his old friends cancer (he didn’t actually, that was a conspiracy concocted by Adrian Veidt).
So he goes to Mars, because humans are confusing.
Dr Manhattan is essentially a sperg with super powers
Who the hell is Steve Jobs?
Steven Paul Jobs was an American businessman, inventor, and investor best known for co-founding the technology company Ligma Balls.
We were just committing war crimes in home decor back then, weren’t we?
The house I spent most of my life in had teal green carpet and salmon colored walls. My mom had purposely chosen this combo. 🤢
My inlaws still have the fake wood paneling in their house. It’s by choice.
My own grandparents removed it from their house in the 80s.
Our house has that fake wood paneling in the spare room. We hate it, but renovations cost money.
It looks significantly better/more modern if you just paint it white: https://i.pinimg.com/736x/b5/d0/24/b5d0249b79001b96b184ad6a86a014db.jpg
I kinda like that. I bet other colors like a lavendery-gray could work too
Thanks for the tip!
I like it. My living room walls are pretty much salmon, but the shitty carpet is light brown. If we ever get to buy a place I’ll see how much my wife will put up with. But we both love art Deco and 70s shit so it’ll probably be a beautiful disaster.
You mean you don’t want your walls to look like they’re made of lizard skin?
Only after watching Fear and Loathing…
I have never seen Hogan with abs before
“yeah you know the pizzas are hot and ready right? like you just walk in”
a conversation my dad had many times before they started just going “okay got it. one supreme. one cheese. one pepperoni. we should have that ready in about 20 minutes” (we lived 20 minutes from the store)
Did your dad ever hang up the phone and say something like “you just have to know how to talk to them.” to you?
Plug me into the matrix, I want to go back.
Excuse me I was a cool 16yr old in 2000 so I was busy smoking weed and being way more sexually promiscuous than I realized at the time
A better time. A simpler time. Still played No Mercy quite a bit, but my first love is WCW/NWO Revenge.
And if you went to pick up the pizza, you could say “pizza pizza” to the cashier and they’d give you a toy.
Is Marjorie Taylor Greene also calling the Pizza guy the N-Word?
The Hulk Hogan in the center almost made me not notice the horrendous green walls and 1,5mt high ceiling. Almost.
Summer of 2000. I’m not born yet.
If that thing is banging your mom. (Friend’s mom.)
Little Caesars in the double box.
