• Mac@mander.xyz
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    93
    arrow-down
    7
    ·
    edit-2
    2 months ago

    Imagine seeing one of these and believing you’re so special that you don’t drain other people’s social batteries. So you get offended when you learn that you do.

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      10
      arrow-down
      14
      ·
      2 months ago

      Not everyone feels drained by talking to people. I’d say most people don’t. Some people, a lot of people actually, get energized talking with people.

      • BastingChemina@slrpnk.net
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        21
        ·
        2 months ago

        I think you described quite accurately the difference between introverts and extroverts.

        Extroverts gain energy with social interaction whereas it costs energy for introverts to be in these social interactions.

      • CileTheSane@lemmy.ca
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        20
        arrow-down
        3
        ·
        2 months ago

        Not everyone feels drained by talking to people

        And those people wouldn’t be wearing this pin.

        People that feel drained from socializing feel that way with everybody.

        • Kalothar@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          2 months ago

          I get energized from conversation and would totally wear this pin

          I think it would be funny to slide it up throughout a social event

      • myplacedk@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        9
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        2 months ago

        I believe scientific studies say it’s somewhere around half of each.

        The reason you don’t see that, is because it’s considered socially unacceptable to get socially drained, so we learn to hide it, usually from very young.

        • GojuRyu@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          2 months ago

          Yeah I was very ready to disagree with it being most people as that is far from my experience. I also come from one of those northern european countries that others describe as cold and closed of because we have a much more introvert aligned culture. And the fact that I’m someone who gets drained probably also biases my sample to more like minded people.

        • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          2 months ago

          The point is that you don’t need to think you’re special, or have some unique arrogance to think that you don’t drain people’s batteries. Younger extroverts have no awareness that there are people who get drained through human interactions.

  • Caesium@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    28
    ·
    2 months ago

    Ive been considering getting one of these honestly. as an introvert there are just some days where I really don’t want to talk to people but retail doesn’t care about that and I need money. at least having some kind of gague seems better than just glowering and hoping i don’t have to deal with small talk

          • weker01@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            21
            ·
            2 months ago

            Do it the German way and just trauma dump. I mean if they didn’t care they shouldn’t have asked.

            In Germany “how are you” is also smalltalk but you are not expected to lie. Just keep it short.

            “Wie geht’s?”

            “Nicht so gut gerade und bei dir?”

            • SolarMonkey@slrpnk.net
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              6
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              2 months ago

              People do that to me all the time. I just seem to radiate safety and people dump everything. I get that they need it, and sometimes (when I’m in a good headspace) I’m happy to provide an outlet for people who need one, but it gets really exhausting. I don’t even like small talk, I only bother with pleasantries because I’m supposed to, apparently.

              (That trauma dumping is totally not the norm around here…)

          • Psychodelic@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            0
            ·
            2 months ago

            It’s worth realizing some people do not want to be cheered up. My understanding is the misery, for lack of a better word, is more comforting to many as it reminds them of when they were young (or they emulate what they saw around them as children)

            • exanime@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              2
              ·
              2 months ago

              It’s worth realizing some people do not want to be cheered up.

              I get that 100% and, although I am sure I made the mistake before, I am trying hard to understand and respect these boundaries

              I am just saying I believe wearing such a pin to avoid people would have a noticeable cobra effect

  • Match!!@pawb.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    24
    arrow-down
    3
    ·
    2 months ago

    imagine flirting with someone and she slides her genderfluid pronoun pin from she/her to he/they

  • teemrokit@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    2 months ago

    I’ve actually bought some of these for some autistic children I used to work with. It gave them agency, even if they weren’t able to communicate it verbally.

  • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    9
    ·
    2 months ago

    I was thinking about gamifying spoon theory in a similar manner.

    It’s in Balatro style. Normally, you have a limited number of spoons each day, which you need to spend on doing things. If you overspend one day, it will raise your burnout levels and your meltdown chance, as well as having less spoons for the next few days. However you can gain various extra spoons and/or kitchen utensils, so you can have a better chance at surviving the day.

    • Honytawk@lemmy.zip
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      16
      ·
      2 months ago

      Isn’t spoon theory just a convoluted way of saying you have limited energy for daily life activities?

        • supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          10
          ·
          2 months ago

          I think it is a case of using a purposefully absurd metaphor because more straight forward ones are too obviously in conflict with basic immutable, toxic aspects of people’s belief systems that function to labotomize their empathy for the hardships of others.

          You know how like other cultures use fairy tales and myths to talk about taboos or impossible truths so does “western” culture use the absurd framework of spoons to talk about the “impossible” state of being incapable of what the ruling class demands of us daily.

        • nelly_man@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          2 months ago

          From the wiki, the idea comes from an essay that somebody has written about a conversation they had with a friend about the struggles of chronic illness. The conversation took place at a restaurant, and she grabbed the spoons for use in a metaphor because there were spoons nearby. She gave her friend a set of spoons, and every time her friend mentioned doing a task, she took a spoon away.

          It could have been anything, but spoons happened to be at hand and she wanted to make a physical representation of an abstract concept. The essay resonated with people, so spoons became entrenched. And now I hear people say that they’re all out of spoons to express the idea that they’ve done all that they can that day.

          • zeppo@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            2 months ago

            Oh. I thought it was supposed to be about how hard it would be to do stuff while carrying around spoons in your hands all day.

        • BallsandBayonets@lemmings.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          2 months ago

          I like to use D&D’s concept of spell slots. Some activities are cantrips, I can do them every day no problem. Other activities may need a leveled spell slot, and depending on what else I need to do I might not have a spell slot available, or may need to use a higher level spell slot for a low-level activity.

          Main difference is a long rest IRL doesn’t always give me all my spell slots back.

      • SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        7
        ·
        2 months ago

        Yes but for some reason when you tell people you don’t have energy they don’t believe you. Because they think mental energy is an infinite resources you can just force out or something

    • golli@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      2 months ago

      spoon theory

      Thanks for introducing me to a new concept (or at least a term for it), always nice to learn something new.

  • fsxylo@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    2 months ago

    “how are you doing?”

    “I’m alright”

    “Oh, just alright?”

    Social battery falls to zero