z500

It helps to be a liquid

It’s usually fine, but I download new TV shows automatically and I got a .exe instead of the new Frasier. I don’t think I’ll be downloading an actual .exe from TPB in the future lol

I don’t know why addressing a cat as “cat” is the funniest thing ever

I once got passed by two speeding DeLoreans. I ended up catching up to them when we all hit a traffic jam.

Apparently “cotton” and “Mexican” are slurs

I seem to remember a competitor, I think it was called 3DO or something?

The heavier…the fewer…

They’re going to lady and the tramp it

Can haz

Hey, we’re learning, okay?

Yeah, it’s clunky for sure, but maybe we just don’t use it for that much

pan to tax preparation companies taking turns sucking off Uncle Sam

If you’re blind, it’s a possibility.

My sister’s tuxedo is so wild, you can tell her mind is going a mile a minute but somehow doesn’t have much going on up there.

I’m already 2 years older than Mozart was when he died, the fuck am I even doing with my life

This reminds me of how I used to eat a spoonful of chunky peanut butter and then add a glug of maple syrup

About 10 years ago someone actually burned to death from static discharge at a gas pump like 2 miles down the road from my house. It’s extremely rare, but it does happen.

Nice, very trochaic

12/10

You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like