Mayor Poopington

Probably because most people don’t speak Ukrainian

Oh my god you’re right, let me just flip this switch here. Don’t know why I didn’t think of that.

Can someone explain like im 5

fetal position in the bathtub, lights off, noize cancelling headphones playing static

I don’t think either of you will be able to smell each other because eating 2000 lbs of garlic will surely kill you.

Menards are stuck to methighs

You must be fun at parties

Scissors really revolutionized clothing when everyone realized they didn’t have to wear the whole sheep

Not entirely true. A number of them are definitely spam, but there are many organizations that do text outreach and there is definitely a person at the other end. They will remove you from their lists if you reply with stop.

These organizations trade phone lists, kind of like what telemarketers do. Sometimes the lists can be outdated. Unfortunately replying “stop” to each one is the only way that’s going to slow it down.

Huh. I’ve never noticed that before

Unfortunately, enshittification is very real. Many of us are here because of the enshittification of reddit.

You would have hated my highschool essays

I have no idea what you mean

Behind the Bastards literally has an episode about this.

I wouldn’t worry too much, they already know

Mine Internet at 500gb, but it’s only an extra $10 for unlimited data. My cell data is unlimited but I know they throttle speed after a certain amount. At least I don’t get charged extra.

tell me more about this brain penis

Damn. I had really hoped my grandchildren would get to play Star Citizen in their lives.

Regular glass just tastes like blood

Same as razor blades