Good point. I did not consider this. Thank you.

You make a terrifyingly interesting point. I did not consider this. Thank you.

I have a smart tv, washer, and dryer. None of them are connected to a network. They can’t do anything “smart” without a network. You don’t need to take apart or disconnect anything. In fact, doing so could cause problems if you nick the wrong wire or component.

Just leave it be and you should be fine.

Honestly, it’s a short-sighted move made with hubris by the developer’s personal ideology. Both @nutomic@lemmy.ml and @dessalines@lemmy.ml admit in the PR that it’s not a good solution, but yet they continue any way — probably because it’s an easy “solution”, despite alienating 41% of their active user base.

It’s a terrible trend in a lot of programming circles that programmers think because it is easy and it “works” that it must be correct. This can be evidenced by browsing StackOverflow and reading the accepted answers for a lot of questions (I do not have any specific examples off the top of my head).

In my 18+ years of experience, if I find an “easy” solution to a complex problem, I keep looking for the correct solution. What is “easy” now will most likely lead to more complex problems down the line. And as they say, “if you can’t find the time to fix it right the first time, where are you going to find the time to fix it again?”

Look, I get Lemmy is meant to be decentralized. Hiding away your biggest instance looks shady to outside users not in the know. The real solution is to “go door to door” to app makers and ask them to not default to any one instance of Lemmy (side note: randomizing a default server is not much better). If anything, add a link to join-lemmy where people can browse the list of ALL instances (yes, ALL of them) and let them make a genuinely-informed decision on their own. As a convenience, and API should be provided (assuming one does not already exist) so that apps can query a pageable/searchable list of existing/active instances (maybe also provide a link to their homepage too).

Hell, if it makes everyone feel warm and fuzzy, the default sorting of returned values can be weighted by percentage of active users (i.e., higher percentages get lower weights to help promote smaller instances). This would help to round out the number of signups without excluding instances.

But whatever developers do (not just Lemmy devs), do NOT overly dictate how people use your software; lest you piss your user base off.

/two-cents

Obligatory: this is not medical advice. This is merely my personal experiences. In fact, the only thing I will advise anyone on is that if they feel overwhelmed, they seek advice from a licensed therapist.

So I’ve had a similar problem for the past 9 years. For me, I have to come to the conclusion that I’m in a freeze-state of my dysregulated nervous system.

I’m in weekly talk therapy, and have been working on recognizing the things that have been causing me the most stress, and ways I can deal with or mitigate those things.

And that’s been all fine and good, but I still struggle with getting started on actual activity to help deal with my compounding responsibilities. It’s hard, and some days are better than others.

I used a combination of calendars and reminders to help break down and organize my tasks. I give myself grace if I can’t get them all comply when I initially wanted to finish them, and I try to do at least 2 or 3 things a day ( o matter how small).

Back when I lived in a two story house, when we got our dogs (different times), I made a point to sleep downstairs when they first came home to help them get acclimated to sleeping downstairs. And anytime they were sick or injured, I would sleep downstairs with them, again so they wouldn’t feel alone.

But now that I live in a single story, and I don’t have a partner who is against dogs in the bed, I let my dog sleep in the bed with me.

s/unfortunately/fortunately/g

Never apologize for tending to your happiness.

Oh man. My ex absolutely hated it when I was right. She would get so mad at me for it too. It was ok for other people to be right when she was wrong; just not me. 🤣

Replace the vase of flowers with a tub of Vaseline or moisturizer.

Oh man, the following few generations are going to be so wild. My pierced and tattooed self can’t wait to hit up the nursing homes when I’m in my 80s; assuming I make it that far. 😏

Goes to show what you know! I don’t even have an upstairs! Because I live in a single story! So take that! 🧏

Yes, and I absolutely need the same tab three or four+ times. It helps with navigation and not having to remember positions in the 70+ stack of tabs where something is.

This should be its own sub to be honest. I bet this would get popular fast.

Here is why I disagree with you (and it’s my fault for how I worded things):

Breaking your arm and suicide are not exactly equal, because one is something that happens to you, and the other is a means to deal with something that happened to you. N other words, you don’t feel the act of suicide itself. You feel like you want to commit suicide.

So with the broken arm analogy, I should have worded it differently. Maybe I should have said that you wouldn’t ridicule or chastise somebody who put their arm in a cast because it was broken. Suicide is a choice made by a person who feels that all other choices have failed them, and they see no other option to stop hurting.

Maybe they’ve tried therapy, medication, talking to a friend or loved one. Maybe they’ve just touched it out in silence for years; maybe they are still touching it out now. They feel like they are in a cluttered room, the lights went out, and everything keeps moving so they keep bumping into stuff finding their way out.

For some people suicide is not a choice, though they wish it were. So they sit in their dark little room, frozen and afraid to try to find their way out because they know the furniture keeps moving around. They sit and they wait, quietly praying that every time they go to sleep that by the grace of <deity>, they won’t wake up. Or maybe that they’ll be driving down the rose — by themselves — and get hit by a drunk driver in a head-on collision. This is called Passive Suicidal Ideation. It’s real, and just as bad as suicide itself.

Here’s a secret: suicidal people do not want to end their life. They want to enjoy life, just like everybody else does. The difference is that they feel burned out, backed into a corner, and desperate to find a way out of this situation. It’s like recoiling and protecting your broken arm from being touched. You don’t want to make the pain worse.

I usually lead with, “That’s out of my control,” or “that’s above my pay grade.” Most of the time people get it.

It’s only really a problem when comments get removed or people get banned because they have opposing views.

I would like to think so. Mostly it’s up to the person if they’re ready to let someone be there for them. You can’t make someone be ready, but you can at least be available to them. It’s different for everyone, so it may take some patience.

If anything, they need grace. You will need grace too. I can only imagine how tough it is watching someone you care about suffer in silence and denial. It’s probably exhausting, so make sure you take care of yourself as well. It’s okay to draw and hold boundaries.

No. Suicide is an act of desperation for people who are in so much pain and anguish that their only option to stop their suffering is by ending their life. They literally see no other solution to their problems.

The worst part about suicide is that there are people out there that can never fully understand why suicide is their only option.

It’s never an easy decision; the internal and external guilt that they are inflicted with over their “selfish decision”, the knowledge of who they inevitably will hurt, the shame of feeling too weak to fix it themselves, the loneliness and abandonment they feel because they can never tell anybody how they genuinely feel, and if they try then they get to be made to feel like garbage for it.

The tightness in their chests, the twisted knot in their throats, the ever present choking feeling from their sadness. It’s ever-present, and washes over you like the waves of the ocean. They push and pull you in uncontrollable directions. Sometimes you get knocked over. Sometimes you get stuck underneath the crash of the wave. You lose your sense of direction, and cannot tell up from down. You’re just trying to gasp for air, but are afraid to breathe too deep for you might drown yourself.

You so desperately want to feel better. You want someone to hug you and tell you it’s going to be okay. You try to reach out and explain things, but it never quite comes out right. People get mad at you for it too. They accuse you of being dramatic or “silly”. If you’re a guy, you’re a “pussy” who needs to “man up”.

But you know what feels worse than all of that?

Attempting suicide and failing. Oh you might think it’s a great thing to have failed, because hey, you’re still alive. It doesn’t work like that. Have you ever come to realize that you’re such a horrible person that you can’t even do one “simple” thing like killing yourself right? That you already fail at everything you do, including this? And now you have to live with that too. And that’s one more thing you can never tell anybody about, because God Forbid how they may look at you after.

So you lie. You tell them some story why your wrist is bandaged up. They believe you too, because they don’t want to face the truth. You could tell them the stupidest reason why you have a huge gash on your wrist, like “I got my hand stuck in my engine trying to work on it,” and no questions will be asked.

No, suicide doesn’t one into living doesn’t help either. You don’t blame a person when they break their arm? If anything, it just makes them feel worse, and further alienates them from reaching out for help. Living with this pain slowly eats away at you from the inside out. It’s slow, painful, and dare I say, inhumane.

How would you treat a loved one who stubs their toe or breaks their arm? Maybe their appendix bursts and they need emergency surgery. How selfish of them, right? They should’ve thought about how it’s make their loved ones feel; then they would’ve thought twice about getting sick or hurt.

Kamala Harris is a non-white, non-GOP woman. Period.

I would imagine that it would be equally devastating to Putin to cut the cables as it would be to anybody else. I want to believe that he’s bluffing, trolling everybody to get their attention and reactions.